Trying to breathe
Trying to breathe as you’re trapped under thick ice
It’s like trying to speak but you can’t find the words
Similar to an awkward silence during a speech
You’re drowning in your own thoughts
You’re screaming but the words won’t fall out
“Help me” you cry
But no one can hear your pleas
Maybe someone will reach in to pull you out
But momma told you to learn to swim
The only problem is you never bothered to learn how.
“Hold your breath” you tell yourself.
Awake, you find yourself lying in your bed no longer under ice
But you still feel the weight pressing you down.
“Move” your brain screams to your limbs, but you can’t.
You’re trapped and your roommate can’t understand.
They don’t understand how much it takes to pull yourself out of bed.
To pull yourself together despite everything screaming inside saying
“No. no. no. no. no
No. no. no. no. no. no.”